niche kin appreciation 27: share tougher experiences you have with this kin and how you persevere

ignore the fact that i skipped one and also that the last one was like a month ago

i feel like the biggest issue i run into with my enderman kintype is the loneliness. ive talked about my issues with water and eye contact before (both in this blog and during the challenge), and those affect me too! but, like i said, ive talked about them before. so lets talk about endermankin loneliness.

being a niche kintype, we endermen are very few and far between. ive met a grand total of 4 endermen during the two years that ive been awakened, and they are great! but something that ive noticed is that no one really… talks about it. enderkin are usually just a word written down on a kinlist that gets forgotten about within the week, and that makes me sad. im not saying this to invalidate anyone, or anything! we are all endermen, regardless of how much an individual decides to share about it. but… it does feel rather lonely. thats why i talk about it so much on my blog: so that somewhere, someone reads about my experiences and decides to share theirs too. an ambitious goal i know, but a girl (gender neutral) can hope.

apart from the alienation i feel from other endermen, there is also the social factor of having to live in human society and act “human”. i am not human, i am an enderman; and a lot of my behaviors reflect this. but i also have to act human, and this causes me a lot of stress and takes a lot of effort to do. it also inevitably isolates me from other people, because i simply dont have the energy to interact with them all of the time. my “social battery” runs out very quickly, and i have to be alone to recharge. most people dont understand this; they love to be surrounded by people all of the time. they cant comprehend that sometimes i just have more fun by myself.

how do i overcome this? i dont i mean, this blog helps a lot. im able to freely talk about my experience, and also to express whatever im thinking. irl, i have friends to talk to, i have flatmates to hang out with. i have Watcher and the rest of my family. i have a dog, Max. also ive been thinking of having a physical journal, though i am terrified of someone finding it and reading it. point is, as cliche as it sounds, i am not alone. do i wish i had other endermen to talk to? yes. do i wish i knew other alterhumans irl? also yes. but i dont think i need it. im fine as i am.